He loved cats. Loved the hell out of them. Not in some weird “I eat cats” kind of way; just loved them. Thought they were cool. Their little minds. Their weird habits. Cats were cool. It was cool to be a cat and he totally supported their right to their cattiness.
Shame they had to go.
The shape had said “No cats. The cats must go,” so, here he was rigging little traps all throughout his basement.
The traps were small and string based. They would be quick. Or, should be quick. God.
He looked at all the little bowls. Fifteen in all. Fifteen little bowls. And he kept them filled all day. The cats came and went through the hatch in the basement door. Of course, the occasional raccoon or possum probably came through as well, but as long as it didn’t deter the cats . . . that was fine.
He baited the traps with expensive cat food.
There had to be at least twenty regulars. And he had a name for each one:
All About Town
Some of them may have actually been several similar cats, but he tried to make them all feel special.
And, now they were doomed. Doomed as a cat can be because what choice did he have?
“I have no choice,” he thought and looked down at his remaining fingers. “Nope, not at this point.”
He went upstairs and dreaded the morning.
Some time at around two in the morning, he woke up and went downstairs.
The basement was empty. None of the traps had been sprung. Maybe the cats smelled something was wrong. Cats could smell wrongness. That was also cool.
He looked at the traps and then at the circle in the center of the floor.
The cats were his friends. You didn’t hurt your friends. His hand still hurt. He had to get his priorities straight.
He took down the traps. He filled the bowls. He waited.
The cats came. They purred. They ate. They left.
The shape came. It screamed. It ate. It left.
The cats returned the following night and gathered up what was left of him. Not his body. That was gone. But . . . the rest.
The cats walked him to the moon.
There were millions of cats. And thousands of people. Everyone seemed happy.
“Thank you,” he said.
“Thank you,” said RompleStomple and All About Town.
“This is where we bring The People Who Feed the Cats,” said Ten Toes, “Feeding cats is cool. It makes you cool like a cat. You’re cool.”
“Cool,” he said.
“Cool,” said the cats.
Then, they all sat down on the moon, looked at the Earth and felt cool together.